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VARR.NOH@CDC.ORG
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unfavouredVARR.NOH@CDC.ORG
(0) UNREAD MESSAGES
unfavouredYou're not, but you're still--
[He falters there, searching for the right words.]
It's easy to think you're older than you are. I wouldn't have guessed you were younger than me, and honestly it still feels a little weird to think about. Cultural differences, I guess.
[Hibari and Vriska. Names he sort of recognizes, but that he isn't familiar with; he's making a mental note to change that, to pick up their signatures if he can and make good on what he'd offered.]
[He falters there, searching for the right words.]
It's easy to think you're older than you are. I wouldn't have guessed you were younger than me, and honestly it still feels a little weird to think about. Cultural differences, I guess.
[Hibari and Vriska. Names he sort of recognizes, but that he isn't familiar with; he's making a mental note to change that, to pick up their signatures if he can and make good on what he'd offered.]
[ He smiles, at that. ]
The Kree don't really have children, just cadets. If you're old enough to move, you're old enough to fight. If you're old enough to think, you're old enough learn. Sciences, engineering, motor skills. We drill in them as soon as we're out of the pods.
[ He shrugs. His thumbs keep tracing foreign patterns into Ryan's side, lazily. ] If I'd never left Hala, I never would have thought it wasn't the only way to do things. The freedom humans give their children is astounding. Isn't there a danger of poor or uneven socialization?
The Kree don't really have children, just cadets. If you're old enough to move, you're old enough to fight. If you're old enough to think, you're old enough learn. Sciences, engineering, motor skills. We drill in them as soon as we're out of the pods.
[ He shrugs. His thumbs keep tracing foreign patterns into Ryan's side, lazily. ] If I'd never left Hala, I never would have thought it wasn't the only way to do things. The freedom humans give their children is astounding. Isn't there a danger of poor or uneven socialization?
[...he can't help it, he laughs-- silently, shoulders shaking as he leans against Noh-Varr, holding on to him a bit more tightly.]
Is there a danger of poor socialization, he asks the guy who lived with a bunch of ghosts.
[Breathe. He can't just leave it at that. Ryan inhales, exhales slowly, and manages to still himself.]
There-- there is, yeah. I mean- I haven't had a lot of human contact in my life, not before I got here. They thought that what I can do was just hallucinations, something wrong, my parents homeschooled me because I couldn't just play normal in public. They were trying to protect me, in a way, but... there are so many ways to just sort of-- get separated from the whole, you know? My case was more on the extreme end, but a lot of people just don't quite fit in. They don't connect in the way most humans do with each other.
[Ryan's silent for a moment there, relaxing a little further before he continues, quiet.]
You start wondering if you ever really can, sometimes. Like I said, not really a normal case, but- shit, I'm not even sure I consider myself human anymore. I call myself human, I'm pretty sure I'm thoroughly biologically human, but I keep catching myself saying they instead of we when I talk about them. Human relations are just... chaotic, at best.
Is there a danger of poor socialization, he asks the guy who lived with a bunch of ghosts.
[Breathe. He can't just leave it at that. Ryan inhales, exhales slowly, and manages to still himself.]
There-- there is, yeah. I mean- I haven't had a lot of human contact in my life, not before I got here. They thought that what I can do was just hallucinations, something wrong, my parents homeschooled me because I couldn't just play normal in public. They were trying to protect me, in a way, but... there are so many ways to just sort of-- get separated from the whole, you know? My case was more on the extreme end, but a lot of people just don't quite fit in. They don't connect in the way most humans do with each other.
[Ryan's silent for a moment there, relaxing a little further before he continues, quiet.]
You start wondering if you ever really can, sometimes. Like I said, not really a normal case, but- shit, I'm not even sure I consider myself human anymore. I call myself human, I'm pretty sure I'm thoroughly biologically human, but I keep catching myself saying they instead of we when I talk about them. Human relations are just... chaotic, at best.
[That gets a chuckle from Garrus as he comes in before briefly brushing his mouthplates to the side of Noh-Varr's neck.]
I'll allow you anything.
I'll allow you anything.
[ He smiles indulgently, reaching up to Garrus' ear, right behind his face plates, and pulls out his earpiece. He speaks again, softly, in Kree: ]
I want to hear you. Your voice. Your language.
[ Placing Garrus' earpiece in the palm of the turian's hand, he pulls out his own, an invitation. ]
I want to hear you. Your voice. Your language.
[ Placing Garrus' earpiece in the palm of the turian's hand, he pulls out his own, an invitation. ]
[Garrus swallows before nodding. He doesn't know what Noh-Varr said, but he can guess.]
This is what you want?
[He reaches out to touch Noh's jaw.]
Without interference?
[What he's speaking is a language none here would understand - not the Council trade tongue, but his own clan's turian, rarely used anywhere off Palaven, rarely even used anywhere outside of Cipritine.]
We can't talk. But we can talk.
This is what you want?
[He reaches out to touch Noh's jaw.]
Without interference?
[What he's speaking is a language none here would understand - not the Council trade tongue, but his own clan's turian, rarely used anywhere off Palaven, rarely even used anywhere outside of Cipritine.]
We can't talk. But we can talk.
[ Clicks and chirps and alveolar trills--Garrus' language is very foreign indeed, but it sounds so much more natural than the awkward Kree his earpiece gives him.
Reaching up, he cups Garrus' face, careful not to interfere with the movement of the mandibles. Kissing the Turian's chin, he makes to lead them to the bed. ]
One day, I'd like to know what you're saying. You could teach me.
[ He's talking just to talk; Kree is melodious and pleasing to the ear, but also contains many guttural sounds, not unlike Arabic. ]
Come here, lovely creature. Let me embrace you.
[ He wraps his arms around Garrus' neck and pulls him down. There's not much need for words, where they're going. ]
Reaching up, he cups Garrus' face, careful not to interfere with the movement of the mandibles. Kissing the Turian's chin, he makes to lead them to the bed. ]
One day, I'd like to know what you're saying. You could teach me.
[ He's talking just to talk; Kree is melodious and pleasing to the ear, but also contains many guttural sounds, not unlike Arabic. ]
Come here, lovely creature. Let me embrace you.
[ He wraps his arms around Garrus' neck and pulls him down. There's not much need for words, where they're going. ]
[Garrus chuckles as he tries out one of the sounds Noh's making. Some of the sounds he's heard humans make he simply can't, but the ones in the back of his throat he's got. Or, at least, he can try to imitate them as he's kissed.]
That sounds pretty hot, gotta say. Not like you can understand a word I'm saying.
[He's followed Noh to the bed and is all too happy to be pulled down. Noh gets a forehead press as Garrus' hands move over the Kree.]
I like you, you know. Really like you. Kinda scares me.
[His subharmonics dip low but they're not entirely steady. There's desire and a little nervousness there. Garrus knows he couldn't say this if they had their translators in, knows that it's risky, and doesn't even really know why he's saying it now. There's no real point. Noh won't understand the words. But maybe having it out there, cloaked as it is, will lessen some of the pressure he feels in his chest.]
Had a lot go wrong, know how easily this could go wrong. But here I am. I want this. I want you. For however long I can get.
That sounds pretty hot, gotta say. Not like you can understand a word I'm saying.
[He's followed Noh to the bed and is all too happy to be pulled down. Noh gets a forehead press as Garrus' hands move over the Kree.]
I like you, you know. Really like you. Kinda scares me.
[His subharmonics dip low but they're not entirely steady. There's desire and a little nervousness there. Garrus knows he couldn't say this if they had their translators in, knows that it's risky, and doesn't even really know why he's saying it now. There's no real point. Noh won't understand the words. But maybe having it out there, cloaked as it is, will lessen some of the pressure he feels in his chest.]
Had a lot go wrong, know how easily this could go wrong. But here I am. I want this. I want you. For however long I can get.
[ When Ryan explains, he can't help a pang of...recognition? Sympathy? Either way, he knows that struggle--being separated from the whole and being uncertain of how to get back, or even if you truly want it. ]
Human relations is an oxymoron: your species seems more intent on killing each other than finding ways to cohabitate. [ He breaths out. He loves humans, but they're slow to change. They've been tearing each other down for thousands of years. ]
The Kree believe in unity. A single culture for the whole. The same education, the same rules, the same standard for everyone. It solves a lot of problems. [ He reaches up, brushing Ryan's hair away from his face. ] For what it's worth--I think you're an excellent example of your species. And I'm glad to have met you.
Human relations is an oxymoron: your species seems more intent on killing each other than finding ways to cohabitate. [ He breaths out. He loves humans, but they're slow to change. They've been tearing each other down for thousands of years. ]
The Kree believe in unity. A single culture for the whole. The same education, the same rules, the same standard for everyone. It solves a lot of problems. [ He reaches up, brushing Ryan's hair away from his face. ] For what it's worth--I think you're an excellent example of your species. And I'm glad to have met you.
[That-- is a thoroughly unexpected compliment, one that leaves him feeling warm and with a smile on his face that he'd feel was embarrassing if he could see it.]
--glad to have met you too, you know.
[And he's still entirely too full of that pleased feeling, there's nothing to do with it but let it out, and so Ryan tilts his head down to kiss him. Not too intently, not too long; just enough for it to be a warm and affectionate thing.]
...but I know what you mean. About other humans. Why d'you think I focus on helping the dead, and people who aren't part of my species?
--glad to have met you too, you know.
[And he's still entirely too full of that pleased feeling, there's nothing to do with it but let it out, and so Ryan tilts his head down to kiss him. Not too intently, not too long; just enough for it to be a warm and affectionate thing.]
...but I know what you mean. About other humans. Why d'you think I focus on helping the dead, and people who aren't part of my species?
[ Ryan's dopey smile echoes in Noh-Varr's chest, and he finds himself returning the kiss, his hand falling to cup Ryan's face, thumbing that smooth jaw. When Ryan pulls away, there's a split second where Noh-Varr moves to pursue, but then abandons the thought when Ryan speaks again. Ryan's humility is something Noh-Varr likes, but the underlying bitterness makes him melancholy. Ryan must have been a lonely child. ]
Humans are one the most creative, diverse species I've ever met--and I used to be part of a crew of intergalactic diplomats, so I don't say that lightly.
[ Propping himself up on his elbows, he hovers over Ryan, his expression fond. ] After all, your species produces individuals like you, or Chidori, or Shepard, or Adrien. They could still surprise you.
[ Gently, he leans down, stealing a second kiss, just as warm and reassuring as the first. ]
Humans are one the most creative, diverse species I've ever met--and I used to be part of a crew of intergalactic diplomats, so I don't say that lightly.
[ Propping himself up on his elbows, he hovers over Ryan, his expression fond. ] After all, your species produces individuals like you, or Chidori, or Shepard, or Adrien. They could still surprise you.
[ Gently, he leans down, stealing a second kiss, just as warm and reassuring as the first. ]
[ Tahk iyat, Garrus repeats as he's kissed. Lovely creature. It only spurrs Noh-Varr on, his hands roving, by now used to all the fastenings of Garrus' armor. Garrus is talking, and he makes himself pause, if only to enjoy the pretty noise. There's something about the intensity in Garrus' gaze that leads him to think the words might be more serious than he'd been led to believe, and his eyes narrow in suspicion. Leaning forward, he kisses Garrus' nose. ]
Look at you. You want the world to believe you're a hard-hearted soldier, but the truth--ah, I know the truth. Garrus Vakarian, you are soft. You give me lovely chirping, and yet you know I'll hurt you. [ Gah-Rus Vah-Kahr-Iyan. In Kree, it sounds so foreign. His fingers trace the contour of the Turian's faceplates, fond and melancholy. Garrus can't understand, and so he won't say anything more. Instead, he sloughs off his shirt and slants his mouth over Garrus' again, silencing them both. ]
Look at you. You want the world to believe you're a hard-hearted soldier, but the truth--ah, I know the truth. Garrus Vakarian, you are soft. You give me lovely chirping, and yet you know I'll hurt you. [ Gah-Rus Vah-Kahr-Iyan. In Kree, it sounds so foreign. His fingers trace the contour of the Turian's faceplates, fond and melancholy. Garrus can't understand, and so he won't say anything more. Instead, he sloughs off his shirt and slants his mouth over Garrus' again, silencing them both. ]
[Not just as a child-- Ryan's been a generally lonely person, and this sort of thing is... not new, but something he's never had often. Sometimes there's still a feeling of newness to it though, when it's been long enough, and he welcomes that second kiss with more enthusiasm than he'd given the first. At this rate Noh-Varr is going to get himself all wrapped up in gangly limbs before too long; it's just nice, and Ryan is clearly more reluctant to break away. His words are murmured almost against his companion's mouth.]
Sweet-talker. [There's a breathy laugh with that.] I hope they do, later. Who knows, maybe eventually they'll believe.
For now though-- [He reaches up to lightly poke his friend's nose with a fingertip. Boop. This is what you get for kissing a huge dork, Noh.] I believe I owe you another kiss for that.
Sweet-talker. [There's a breathy laugh with that.] I hope they do, later. Who knows, maybe eventually they'll believe.
For now though-- [He reaches up to lightly poke his friend's nose with a fingertip. Boop. This is what you get for kissing a huge dork, Noh.] I believe I owe you another kiss for that.
FROM: leng.kai@cdc.org
Do you think I'd try? Here on the ship?
FROM: leng.kai@cdc.org
Do you think I feel so strongly about you that I'd violate my contract for you?
Do you think I'd try? Here on the ship?
FROM: leng.kai@cdc.org
Do you think I feel so strongly about you that I'd violate my contract for you?
[ He obviously doesn't mind being tangled; in fact, his own body is almost entirely dense muscle and as such, Ryan's skinny limbs will find decent padding. As tempted as he is by that offer of another kiss, there's something that tempts him further-- ]
Mmm, you do. [ His nose wrinkles at the boop. Really, Ryan? ] But I think you also promised to show me your tattoos.
[ His tone of voice isn't actually all that suggestive, despite their position. One of his hands reaches up, tugging gently at the neckline of Ryan's shirt collar. ]
Mmm, you do. [ His nose wrinkles at the boop. Really, Ryan? ] But I think you also promised to show me your tattoos.
[ His tone of voice isn't actually all that suggestive, despite their position. One of his hands reaches up, tugging gently at the neckline of Ryan's shirt collar. ]
FROM: jablonski.baqer@cdc.org
I'm feeling very welcomed.
I'm feeling very welcomed.
[He's quick to place a hand over Noh-Varr's, enough so that it's clearly more reflexive than anything; Ryan relaxes a moment later with a slightly sheepish smile, though, shifting away so that he's sitting faced away from him as he starts to undo the buttons.]
Just let me get this out of the way, yeah? They're mostly toward the back, [he says to explain, hoping that covers it. Noh doesn't actually need Ryan to face him to see the tattoos, and he can easily just use the shirt to keep his chest covered once he's shed it. The ink, he doesn't mind showing off. The mark left behind from the spirit that passed through him, though, he's more self conscious about.]
Just let me get this out of the way, yeah? They're mostly toward the back, [he says to explain, hoping that covers it. Noh doesn't actually need Ryan to face him to see the tattoos, and he can easily just use the shirt to keep his chest covered once he's shed it. The ink, he doesn't mind showing off. The mark left behind from the spirit that passed through him, though, he's more self conscious about.]
[ Ryan isn't a small person by any means, but he's skinny, and the tattoos seem to take up a disproportionate amount of space on his thin frame, by Noh-Varr's standards. He reaches a finger towards Ryan's back, hovering over the white bird. He almost asks if he may, but decides against it. He isn't usually so cautious, especially not with touch like this, but these tattoos are meaningful to Ryan, and he wants to treat them--and their owner--with the care they deserve.
His fingers trace the edge of the white bird's head, the beak, the beady eye, then down to the wing. He looks at the book. what is its title? ]
Explain to me. The meaning.
His fingers trace the edge of the white bird's head, the beak, the beady eye, then down to the wing. He looks at the book. what is its title? ]
Explain to me. The meaning.
Edited 2014-12-29 05:46 (UTC)
[He can't help the small, reflexive shiver that runs down his spine when Noh-Varr's fingers trace along the tattoo; it's not often that he leaves more skin bared than usual, and the feeling is one he hasn't been used to lately. Ryan absolutely isn't complaining, though, and after a moment he's managed to relax more thoroughly. On close inspection, the book the white raven's perching on is a collection of Poe's poems- it seemed thematically appropriate.]
With the birds-- ravens, in a lot of myths, are bad omens. Signs of death, though in a couple other myths they're tricksters or creators. They're actually really highly intelligent birds, though, they can solve problems and manipulate other scavengers into helping them feed, that kind of thing.
[His tone's awfully fond, really.]
So I picked them for the intelligence and associations with death. That one's white to go along with one particular myth that they're actually souls.
With the birds-- ravens, in a lot of myths, are bad omens. Signs of death, though in a couple other myths they're tricksters or creators. They're actually really highly intelligent birds, though, they can solve problems and manipulate other scavengers into helping them feed, that kind of thing.
[His tone's awfully fond, really.]
So I picked them for the intelligence and associations with death. That one's white to go along with one particular myth that they're actually souls.
[ Noh-Varr knows that Edgar Allan Poe's most famous work has something to do with a raven, and not much else, so he nods along to Ryan's words, his fingers tracing to the shoulder with Death. That one seems simple enough. The other one, and he has to encourage Ryan to tilt his body a bit to see it better, is the Tower, which he isn't at all familiar with. ]
A tower? [ A beat, then, perhaps a little wryly: ] More death?
[ He understands it's meaningful to someone with long experience ferrying people from one world to the next; in a sense, what Ryan can do isn't so far removed from America Chavez's dimension-hopping powers. But it still strikes him as...grim. Noh-Varr doesn't think of Ryan as a bad omen; it hasn't completely occurred to him that Ryan might think of himself that way. ]
A tower? [ A beat, then, perhaps a little wryly: ] More death?
[ He understands it's meaningful to someone with long experience ferrying people from one world to the next; in a sense, what Ryan can do isn't so far removed from America Chavez's dimension-hopping powers. But it still strikes him as...grim. Noh-Varr doesn't think of Ryan as a bad omen; it hasn't completely occurred to him that Ryan might think of himself that way. ]
They're tarot cards- used for divination, if you're not familiar. I managed to bring my deck when I signed on if you want me to show you sometime.
[Another thing he only rarely shows others. Card-reading is the one real superstitious activity he allows himself, and only because it's worked; sure, he'll also claim his cards are assholes to him, but if they weren't then he'd be suspicious about whether the results were accurate.]
The Death card doesn't exactly symbolize it literally, either. It just means an end to something, it's a metaphorical death, you know? And the Tower is--
[There he has to pause, fumbling for the words.]
It's another thing people see as a bad sign, destruction, but that's not all it is. It's chaos and disruption and change. And that's not necessarily for the worst, yeah?
[And, given those explanations, Noh-Varr might be able to guess why Ryan is attached to those cards in particular. It's very similar to his feelings about death in general, really: something people fear, see as a negative thing, when in all honesty it's not so bad. There's more depth than the ill omens people see when they look at them; ends mean new beginnings, change is complex.]
[Another thing he only rarely shows others. Card-reading is the one real superstitious activity he allows himself, and only because it's worked; sure, he'll also claim his cards are assholes to him, but if they weren't then he'd be suspicious about whether the results were accurate.]
The Death card doesn't exactly symbolize it literally, either. It just means an end to something, it's a metaphorical death, you know? And the Tower is--
[There he has to pause, fumbling for the words.]
It's another thing people see as a bad sign, destruction, but that's not all it is. It's chaos and disruption and change. And that's not necessarily for the worst, yeah?
[And, given those explanations, Noh-Varr might be able to guess why Ryan is attached to those cards in particular. It's very similar to his feelings about death in general, really: something people fear, see as a negative thing, when in all honesty it's not so bad. There's more depth than the ill omens people see when they look at them; ends mean new beginnings, change is complex.]
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
I can stop sending these. I should probably stop sending these. Sorry. The radio silence is driving me up the hull and I wanna know that you’re still with me.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Meant that last one. All of them, really. And don’t tell me I’m fretting. You’re sick and I have every damn right to fret.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
And the fifth was the best. Even you've gotta admit that.
I can stop sending these. I should probably stop sending these. Sorry. The radio silence is driving me up the hull and I wanna know that you’re still with me.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
Meant that last one. All of them, really. And don’t tell me I’m fretting. You’re sick and I have every damn right to fret.
FROM: vakarian.garrus@cdc.org
And the fifth was the best. Even you've gotta admit that.
Edited 2014-12-31 22:58 (UTC)
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