[ For a second, she just stares at him blankly. Then her expression twists up with exasperation as she groans. ]
Uuuuuuuugh. I should have known you'd want all of that explained. Do you need a flowchart and a bunch of diagrams, too? No, I'm not joking. That was the power of Sgrub.
[ Deep breath. ]
Sgrub is a game my friends and I played. When we started, we didn't know it would set off the apocalypse. We also didn't know that it wasn't actually the trigger, and that the apocalypse was always already going to happen, but it sure seemed like the trigger at the time. That is how my planet got blown up! It was destroyed because the circumstances of the game mandated it.
The whole point of the game is to create a new universe! To do so, you have to go on these epic quests spanning many planets and undertake lots of grueling personal journeys! Not to mention kill tons of monsters. Of course, I skipped a lot of that bullshit, because I was an awesome gamer and I was great at breaking the rules. [ She cracks a smile. ]
So my friends and I played the game and we all became pretty strong! Strong enough to face what should have been the game's final boss. The Black King. But it turns out we completely miscalculated, and we paid for it! We ended up having to run and hide on some meteor out in the middle of fucking nowhere, and that was it for us.
Anyway, our instance of playing the game was one session. The humans we knew played another session, and my ancestors played another! And finally, there was a second human session. Four sessions altogether, spanning four different universes, all of which begot each other through a series of events I can only describe as shenanigans.
[ She pauses, then lowers her chin to give him a sharp, arch look. ]
no subject
Uuuuuuuugh. I should have known you'd want all of that explained. Do you need a flowchart and a bunch of diagrams, too? No, I'm not joking. That was the power of Sgrub.
[ Deep breath. ]
Sgrub is a game my friends and I played. When we started, we didn't know it would set off the apocalypse. We also didn't know that it wasn't actually the trigger, and that the apocalypse was always already going to happen, but it sure seemed like the trigger at the time. That is how my planet got blown up! It was destroyed because the circumstances of the game mandated it.
The whole point of the game is to create a new universe! To do so, you have to go on these epic quests spanning many planets and undertake lots of grueling personal journeys! Not to mention kill tons of monsters. Of course, I skipped a lot of that bullshit, because I was an awesome gamer and I was great at breaking the rules. [ She cracks a smile. ]
So my friends and I played the game and we all became pretty strong! Strong enough to face what should have been the game's final boss. The Black King. But it turns out we completely miscalculated, and we paid for it! We ended up having to run and hide on some meteor out in the middle of fucking nowhere, and that was it for us.
Anyway, our instance of playing the game was one session. The humans we knew played another session, and my ancestors played another! And finally, there was a second human session. Four sessions altogether, spanning four different universes, all of which begot each other through a series of events I can only describe as shenanigans.
[ She pauses, then lowers her chin to give him a sharp, arch look. ]
Any questions?